the dumbest criminals of 2010.

It's the last day of 2010 so what better way to end it! (I know, there's plenty of better things to do).

• The broke guy who walked into a bank claiming to have a bomb and demanding $2000, who was then convinced by the bank manager to fill out a loan application.
• The middle aged gardener who was upset that someone had stolen one of his marijuana plants, so called the police to report the theft. The police responded by swiping his other four plants.
• The man who cut ahead of two uniformed police officers in line at Starbucks and then demanded cash from the till. The man was quickly tackled and arrested.
• The Florida woman who started a fire in a filing cabinet at work so she could go home early and still get a full day's pay.
• the carjacker who dropped his gun into his 69 year old victim's lap; she quickly picked it up and aimed it back at him.
• The husband and wife team who made a living by shoplifting and re-selling the goods online, and went on TV's Dr Phil to brag about it.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR for tonight. The final full year before we die in 2012 (if you believe in it- I don't.)

My Words of 2010 [R18- explicit content]

Well it's nearly the new year and I have to decide which of the many parties I shall grace with my presence and pass out on their floor (I know you're reading this people who spiked my orange juice. Not naming anyone -_-)
But would a new years (or at least week prior) be without some completely pointless reminiscing. And being the grammar nazi that I am (yes I know I started a sentence with And) I decided to think of my words of 2010 *said with really deep, dramatic movie trailer voice*.

My vocabulary spans a vast distance and this year was no different. My conversations have ranged from the sexual to the violent to the edible, to the musical and then back to the sexual (in that exact order). So here's the list of my made up words of 2010.
Jizztastic, spermalicious, cumageddon, cumland (might I add most of these weren't invented by me; don't judge me so badly) semensational and my personal favourite cumbubalicious (pronounced cum-bub-ah-lish-iss). Now you may be thinking "oh he just made these up". Well, um, duh! I did say above "my list of made up words". These were made up over the course of 2010 and mainly when I was bored in english (hopes teacher doesn't read). And yes, these HAVE all been used in GENERAL conversation within my immediate (and most likely only) group of friends. Which begs the question. "What do they talk about?" That, my innocent reader will be answered another day ( I need some material for future blogs). And I can assure you. YOU [probably] DO NOT WANT TO KNOW!!!

If you do then look forward to my future posts :).

My Enlightenment.

So I sit here, already bored (because I'm writing a blog post. it's my last resort) on the second week of my holidays. A typical Wellington summers day outside of cloud and wind and.....well yeah, I'm just bored.
Although I could be forgiven for this boredom after last Saturday, the day of pilgrimage to see my gods. The great  BON JOVI! The super-human group of Jon Bon Jovi, Richie Sambora and the other two nobody really cares about. But they're still awesome. Oh it was amazing, but oh how it made the rest of my holidays completely crap in comparison. Oh well paintball on Monday. Might be good to get my ass kicked at that.